FIDDLE, n. An instrument to tickle human ears by friction of a horse's tail on the entrails of a cat.

Aristocrats: n. fellows that wear downy hats and clean shirts - guilty of education and suspected of bank accounts.

Consult: To seek approval for a course of action already decided upon.

STORY, n. A narrative, commonly untrue.

JESTER, n. An officer attached to the king's household to amuse the court by ludicrous actions and utterances . . . the king's own conduct and decrees [being] sufficiently ridiculous for the amusement not only of his court but of all mankind.

LEGACY, n. A gift from one who is legging it out of this vale of tears.

FEMALE, n. One of the opposing, or unfair, sex.