FIDDLE, n. An instrument to tickle human ears by friction of a horse's tail on the entrails of a cat.

Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.

ELECTOR, n. One who enjoys the sacred privilege of voting for the man of another man's choice.

HASH: There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.

DISCUSSION, n. A method of confirming others in their errors.

Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.

MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earth and Canada.