HUMORIST, n. A plague that would have softened down the hoar austerity of Pharaoh's heart and persuaded him to dismiss Israel with his best wishes, cat-quick.

RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against whom they are loaded.

An immaterial but visible being that inhabited the air when the air was an element and before it was fatally polluted with factory smoke, sewer gas and similar products of civilization.

A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.

Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.

FINANCE, n. The art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager. The pronunciation of this word with the i long and the accent on the first syllable is one of America's most precious discoveries and possessions.

Enthusiasm - a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.