Distress: A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.

RESPIRATOR, n. An apparatus fitted over the nose and mouth of an inhabitant of London, whereby to filter the visible universe in its passage to the lungs.

Enthusiasm - a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.

If you want to read a perfect book there is only one way: write it.

CRAYFISH, n. A small crustacean very much resembling the lobster, but less indigestible.

Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.

The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.