The best kind of onion soup is the simplest kind.

General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.

RECONCILIATION, n. A suspension of hostilities. An armed truce for the purpose of digging up the dead.

DELEGATION, n. In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.

CONSOLATION, n. The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself.

A book which the Mohammedans foolishly believe to have been written by divine inspiration, but which Christians know to be a wicked imposture, contradictory to the Holy Scriptures.

Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.