Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

FLAG, n. A colored rag borne above troops and hoisted on forts and ships. It appears to serve the same purpose as certain signs that one sees and vacant lots in London

PRE-EXISTENCE, n. An unnoted factor in creation.

POLITICIAN, n. An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared. When he wriggles, he mistakes the agitation of his tail for the trembling of the edifice.

Revolution, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.

The liberality of one who has much, in permitting one who has nothing to get all that he can.

Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.