Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

PLEBEIAN, n. An ancient Roman who in the blood of his country stained nothing but his hands. Distinguished from the Patrician, who was a saturated solution.

Human nature is pretty well balanced; for every lacking virtue there is a rough substitute that will serve at a pinch--as cunning is the wisdom of the unwise, and ferocity the courage of the coward.

PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors.

Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.

PIE, n. An advance agent of the reaper whose name is Indigestion.

The god of the world's leading religion.