LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose; without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg "pate".

Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.

WAR, n. A by-product of the arts of peace. The most menacing political condition is a period of international amity.

Justice is a commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service.

The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.

APHORISM, n. Predigested wisdom.

IGNORAMUS, n. A person unacquainted with certain kinds of knowledge familiar to yourself, and having certain other kinds that you know nothing about.