The "natural" instincts when someone is going through a breakup are counterintuitive to healing. For instance, many people stop eating or eat very unhealthy, and if your body is not fed the necessary nutrients during this trying time, it's extremely difficult for you to heal emotionally. So, first things first, force yourself to eat, even if that entails drinking green smoothies so you're getting nutrients in your body.
Amy ChanTry to look at the bigger picture. The majority of people you date will not be your destination. They were meant to be a bridge. So find the lesson, the growth opportunity so you don't have to keep repeating your pattern and crossing that same bridge over and over again. Once you learn what you need to learn and become more self-aware and emotionally healthy, you will then cross another bridge, and one day you'll get to your destination.
Amy ChanWhat really has helped me through my own breakups has been learning tools to self-soothe, reframe, and forgive, and how to channel negative energy into positive. Resilience is a muscle. Learning how to cope and process painful emotions is a muscle. And I've been through enough ups and downs to know that you have a choice. You can use breakups, which are pivotal points in life, as a catalyst for growth, or you can choose to have it make you jaded and more fear-based.
Amy Chan