I made out with a homeless guy by accident. I had no idea -- he was really tan, he had no shoes on. I just thought it was, like, his thang, you know? I was like, 'He's probably in a band.

I only met Joan Rivers once. But when she passed away, it felt like a part of me went away, too.

I finally just slept with my high school crush. But I swear; now he expects me to go to his graduation - like I know where I'm going to be in three years.

I like to create stuff. I like to express myself through jokes.

She's always bragging about the dumbest stuff. The other day she was telling me, she's like, 'You know I can still fit in my wedding dress.' I was like, 'Oh my god, who cares, right?' I mean it is weird that she's the same size now as she was when she was 8 months pregnant.

You know what they say: 'Once you go black, your parents don't talk to you anymore.

We had to break up, though. We wanted different things - like he wanted kids and I wanted him to hear.