I finally just slept with my high school crush. But I swear; now he expects me to go to his graduation - like I know where I'm going to be in three years.
Amy SchumerWe had to break up, though. We wanted different things - like he wanted kids and I wanted him to hear.
Amy SchumerI only wear heels when it's 100-percent required, and even sometimes not then. I have to talk myself into a bra. I've done an hour of standup where I've been like, "I don't have to wear a bra tonight." If you're going to be on camera, you have to get it together, but other than that, I am pretty lazy as a woman.
Amy Schumer