Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener's ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school.

My kitchen's pink, like skin-tone pink, and I lowered my spice rack so it's eye level - it's true! - and my phone, so I can reach it when I fall, it's right there.

If I'm creating something for myself, then I want to have fun.

Learn more about yourself! Make a self-esteem collage using pictures of other people you wish you were.

We're all used to seeing pretty people. I want to see real people.

Most people think witches are a coven of lesbians dancing naked in the forest celebrating the semen stolen from imprisoned hypnotized males, which they then use to inseminate one another using turkey basters in order to create a legion of demon babies. Well, that's only part of it. We are also active in community outreach programs.

I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone.