Most people in the Tea Party are nice, but that hasn't stopped liberals from hating them.

I know Jesus Christ died for my sins, and that's all I really need to know.

Even if evolution were true, it wouldn't disprove God. God has performed more spectacular feats than evolution. It's not even a daunting challenge to a belief in God. If you want something that complicates a belief in God, try coming to terms with Michael Moore being one of God's special creatures.

I think [Whitewater]'s going to prevent the First Lady from running for Senate.

Contempt is the emotion we feel for an opponent whose arguments are too formidable to refute.

Fundamentalist Muslim terrorists kill three thousand Americans, but America isn't supposed to respond, because if we respond, they'll respond. We always hear about 'karmic retributions' and the 'cycle of violence' only after we've been hit.

The key to the U.N.'s global warming study was man's use of aerosol spray. You have to know the French were involved in a study concluding that Arrid Extra Dry is destroying the Earth. In a world in which everyone smelled, the French would be at no disadvantage. Aerosol spray. How convenient.