Put yourself in Hamlet's shoes. Suppose you were a prince, and you came back from college to discover that your uncle had murdered your father and married your mother, and you fell in love with a beautiful girl and mistakenly murdered her father, and then she went crazy and drowned herself. What would you do? Go back for a masters?

Any company executive who overcharges the government more than $5 million will be fined $50 or have to go to traffic school three nights a week

I'm working when I'm fighting with my wife. I constantly ask myself-how can I use this stuff to literary advantage.

I contemplated suicide. My main concern was that I would not make the New York Times obituary page.

People are broad-minded. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater and even a newspaperman, but if a man does not drive, there is something wrong with him.

I don't know whether it's normal or not, but sex has always been something that I take seriously. I would put it higher than tennis on my list of constructive things to do.

Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven't been taxed before.