I prefer temperance hotels - although they sell worse kinds of liquor than any other kind of hotels.

It is true, that all married men have their own way, but the trouble is they don't all have their own way of having it.

I can't sing. As a singist I am not a success. I am saddest when I sing. So are those who hear me. They are sadder even than I am.

Imagine for a moment Napoleon I, to have borne the name of Jenkins, or Washington to have sustained the appellation of John Smith!

A writer who can't write in a grammerly manner better shut up shop.

We wish genius and morality where affectionate companions, but it is a fact that they are often bitter enemies. They don't necessarily coalesce any more than oil and water do.

Trouble will come soon enough, and when he does come receive him as pleasantly as possible. The more amiably you greet him, the sooner he will go away.