Better to go than sit around being a terrible old bore.

History, having destroyed the religion as the opium of the people, now requires that they be given a taste of the real stuff.

You should tell the truth as often as you can, but in such a way as people don't believe you or think that you're being funny.

Better to go than sit around being a terrible old bore.

Unless people are prepared to declare themselves your enemies you have to hunt around for them.

Anyone might become homosexual after seeing Glenda Jackson naked.

Looking back at all the people I have insulted, I am mildly surprised that I am still allowed to exist.