My biggest mistake: not wanting to help myself into thinking I am happy, that change would come about without really trying to change, or wanting to change. Procrastinating about changing. I do want to change.

Sometimes fantasies are better than life.

I guess I'll never measure up to anyone's expectations. I surely don't measure up to what I'd like to be.

one day I'll be old, without ever having really been young

They have accepted me as an individual, as a personality, as an entity. I belong! I am important! I am somebody!

I’ve got to sleep. Sleep is my only way to escape.

The same old dumb teachers teaching the same old dumb subjects in the same old dumb school. I seem to be kind of losing interest in everything. At first I thought high school would be fun but it's just dull. Everything's dull. Maybe it's because I'm growing up and life is becoming more blase.