That which does not kill us has to get up extra early in the morning if it wants to get us next time.

Carved above the lintel were the words SCIENTIA POTESTAS EST. Science points east, I wondered? Science is portentous, yes? Science protests too much. Scientific potatoes rule. Had I stumbled on the lair of dangerous plant geneticists?

On the plus side, there were no rioters in sight but on the minus side this was probably because everywhere I looked was on fire.

My dad was a fairy," said Zach. "And by that I don't mean he dressed well and enjoyed musical theatre.

That which does not kill us has to get up extra early in the morning if it wants to get us next time.

For a terrifying moment I thought he was going to hug me, but fortunately we both remembered we were English just in time. Still, it was a close call.

Landscaping is the great cardinal sin of modern architecture. It's not your garden, it's not a park - it's a formless patch of grass, shrubbery and the occasional tree that exists purely to stop the original developer's plans from looking like a howling concrete wilderness.