I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but by pointing out its flaws?

Time magazine put Chris Christie on the cover with the caption, 'The Elephant in the Room.' And People magazine named him 'Sexiest Garbage Truck in a Suit.'

Well, I hate to tell youbut if you have a flu shot for more than five years in a row, there's ten times the likelihood that you'll get Alzheimer's disease.

To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.

That's what American democracy has come down to at these town hall meetings: old people and gun nuts, which is a terrible combination. I heard somebody yell 'AK-47!' and a lady yelled, 'Bingo!'

Religion is insanity by consensus.

The country can't get well if the people are sick. And the people are sick.