Every asshole who ever chanted 'Drill baby drill' should have to report to the Gulf coast today for cleanup duty.

I would describe my spirituality as exactly the opposite of having a religious affiliation.

Religion is insanity by consensus.

I'm against suing tobacco companies. I think abstinence is a perversion. I think Bush's lies are worse than Clinton's. I think Vegas was better when it was run by the mob. I think men are only as loyal as their options. I think stereotypes are true and rehab is for quitters.

When we make mistakes they call it evil

It just seems like atheists are not included in the basket of diversity in America, which is odd because we are the biggest minority. That is a bigger minority than any other minority you can name.

Their [Republicans] approach to a woman's body is the same as their approach to the economy: they have no idea how it works, but they're eager to screw with it anyway.