When we make mistakes they call it evil

Religion, it stops people from thinking because they think all the answers are in that one book; it impedes progress; it justifies crazy people. Flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative.

Tiger Woods apologized to the three women in America he never got around to sleeping with.

I urge the media to start referring to climate skeptics as what they really are: climate assholes.

Your fuselage shouldn't open more easily than your pretzel bag.

You know, we do a lot of complaining here in America. And that itself is something they can't do in a lot of other countries.

[The Republicans] are always asking the Muslims to denounce their extremists. And I agree with them. But they don't take that note and do it among their own. They don't denounce their own extremists.