Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic.

I was out at the HBO party, these are liberals, I imagine, and a lot of people came up to me and said, "Keep giving it to the president."

Today Obama was seen leaving the White House in a nurse's uniform on a flight to Cuba to smother Castro with a pillow.

Is it [hunting] really a sport if you have all the equipment and your opponent doesn't know a game is going on?

So many kids are fat drug addicts these days, it's almost as if Rush Limbaugh had puppies.

I'd like to protect children, too, but... is everything worth sacrificing to that? I mean, drugs have done a lot of good... They've midwived a lot of good ideas... lot of great songs, you know? I think "Penny Lane" is worth 10 dead kids... I think Dark Side of the Moon is worth 100 dead kids. There, I said it.

Beating Newt Gingrich in a popularity contest is like beating Stephen Hawking in 'Dancing with the Stars.'