Newt Gingrich was campaigning at a zoo this week and he was bitten by a penguin. Newt Gingrich is always campaigning at zoos. Mitt Romney once did a photo op at a zoo. That was a big mistake, because he stood next to the chameleon, and HE changed colors.

I would rather put up with Rush Limbaugh and live in a country where we all do have freedom of speech.

I don't understand why the police are infallible. They remind me a lot of the Catholic Church.

People are either good or they're not. Religion doesn't make anybody good, I don't think.

In New York now, they have Harvey Milk High School for gay students. They don't have much of a football team, but the half-time show . . .

If you can look at a crime where everything points to one answer and not see it, you're a dumb-ass. And if you can look at the deficit and not see that the problem is that the rich stopped paying taxes, you're a Republican.

They told us to buy duct tape and portable radios so that if the world does end, we can all listen to Rush Limbaugh blame it on Clinton.