Stupidity is not another form of knowledge.

I understand we're on our way to being a Third World country. Could we just stop at 'Second World' before we get there?

People have to stop saying that just because someone is an anti-gay activist they might be gay. They're DEFINITELY GAY!!

Again, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don't pay attention.

John Kerry made a joke about Bush being a moron, and now Bush wants morons to think it was a joke was about the troops. ... Now, John Kerry has apologized. He said he made a botched joke and admitted that he has a joking problem. He has checked into an improv group and revealed that as a child, he was molested by a clown.

Don't wear bacon cologne. If you put on...you know what? Screw it. Wear it. If you are the type of guy who is tempted to wear bacon cologne, it's not like you could get laid any less.

We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying in the airplane when it hits the building, say what you want about it, it's not cowardly.