I kid the Republicans, with love. I feel bad for them. They got nobody for next time. Who are they gonna run? Sarah Palin, reading off her hand. Did you see that? You saw this? She wrote "tax cuts" on her hand. A Republican so stupid she has to be reminded of the one thing - Tax cuts! This is like if you saw the coyote's paw and it said "Road Runner".
Bill MaherLaughter is sort of a natural truth detector. If you laugh at something, it's probably because there was some truth in it.
Bill MaherWhy are there so many puritans in this country, and why can't the rest of us make them go away?!
Bill MaherIf conservatives get to call universal healthcare 'socialized medicine,' I get to call private, for-profit healthcare 'soulless, vampire bastards making money off human pain.'
Bill Maher