If a President must constantly remind the people that we're at war, then we're not.

In New York now, they have Harvey Milk High School for gay students. They don't have much of a football team, but the half-time show . . .

The president finally explained why he sat in that classroom on 9/11 for 7 minutes after he was told the country was under attack. He said he was 'collecting his thoughts.' What a time to start a new hobby.'

Only a Bush could answer a 'yes' or 'no' question two different ways and be wrong both times.

Don't you think that being a person of faith has become a third rail in American politics? If you want to run for president nowadays, you'd better get out there and say you're a very faith-based person.

I'd just like to know what a cop WOULD have to do to get indicted - and what good are cop cameras since Eric Garner IS on tape?

A new cologne is coming out. It's for cowboys, and it's made from cow's manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!