I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple.

I guess I just don't have the killer instinct that I think makes a great political cartoonist.

I wish I had more friends, but people are such jerks. If you can just get most people to leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find even one person you really like, you're lucky. And if that person can also stand you, you're really lucky.

Calvin: I'm a genius. I can't believe how smart I am. ...I've got more brains than I know what to do with. Hobbes: So I've noticed.

CALVIN: When I grow up I want to be an inventor. First I will invent a time machine. Then I'll come back to yesterday and take myself to tomorrow and skip this dumb assignment.

I'M SIGNIFICANT!!! ... Say's the dust speck.

It's a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it's light out.