Calvin: Trick or treat! Adult: Where's your costume? What are you supposed to be? Calvin: I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak... Am I scary, or what?

Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.

Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.

Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination.

At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you'll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.

I'm related to people I don't relate to.

I'm a misunderstood genius." "What's misunderstood?" "Nobody thinks I'm a genius.