History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.

To invent your own life's meaning is not easy, but it's still allowed, and I think you'll be happier for the trouble.

I've got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.

Calvin is hammering nails into coffee table. Mom: CALVIN WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THE COFFEE TABLE?!? Calvin: Is this some sort of trick question, or what?

Mom and Dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in... But every time I do, they tell me to stop it.

I'm willing to take the blame if the strip goes down the drain, and I want the credit if it succeeds. So long as it has my name on it, I want it to be mine.

Sleepwalking?" "Nightmare?" "Homicidal psycho jungle cat!