When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here?
Billy ConnollyThe great thing about Glasgow is that if there's a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards.
Billy ConnollyThe strangest thing is at tea breaks, or coffee breaks or lunch, you forget you're a zombie. And you're talking about politics to somebody at the table and you forget that you have a bullet hole in your forehead.
Billy Connolly,000 people in Hampden Park. Of course they're all Scottish. Because no one else goes there. The English have an unwritten rule: they only go to places they might get back from.
Billy ConnollyIโve come in and out of America forโฆ well, Iโve lived here for 15 years. And Iโve played here for nearly 30 years. On and off. But Iโve always played to my fan base. And I can come and do two or three nights in New York or two or three nights in L.A., and all that. But when I go away, nobody knows Iโve been gone. You know, I donโt get reviewed or anything like that. So thatโs why Iโve come back and done a longer time in a smaller place, in New York. Itโs always the people who live here that get a chance to know me.
Billy Connolly