I think it's creepy if a guy says, I would never hit a girl. Cause that should go without saying. That's like if you ever heard a guy go, I would never crap in a hot tub.

There's no such thing as a feminist - just women who pay for their own breast implants.

Sometimes when I'm bored, I like to people watch. And I got to a touristy area and I play this game I just made up. I call it Lesbian or Midwestern?

Intellectually, I think everyone really knows that women are funny, but it's a weird thing that people keep trotting out.

I love my hunting dog. I loved my hunting dog - I'm not very good at hunting.

You know, women are burdened with all this other crap all the time, like looking good. You need to be really superhuman to be successful as a woman.

If you enjoy shaming people, I suggest dentistry as a profession.