I'm constantly watching satirical news programs, and just - I never want to be in a situation where someone could yell out a topic and I will have absolutely no opinion on it whatsoever, or just not even know it exists.

Yeah, people do need to realize that just because they've seen me perform for an hour does not mean that we are now close.

There are plenty of wonderful, good fat people in the USA that have no problems being fat, who I have no problems with being fat.

I don't get all the anger that is thrown at comedians.

People ask me a lot like, "Hey, so when are you done with your tour?" Like when I die. That's when I'm done with my tour.

If I do talk politics it's very surface, it's not in-depth.

It takes a surprisingly large amount of intelligence to be a professional idiot.