There are enough tears in any child's life; we certainly don't need to add to them in the name of entertainment.

I hate Mondays - I hate that feeling you've got to get yourself up.

It's frightening, the way life speeds up. When you're at school, time can't go fast enough.

I don't do close-ups any more. I am better looking from the waist downwards.

That Mick Jagger, I feel sorry for him. After all these years he still can't get no satisfaction.

When I was in the business as a young performer, it was a recognised fact that when you got to 60 you were out, because there'd be a new crop of comics coming up all the time, every 10 years or so.

Goodness, that Simon Cowell is a sensitive soul.