Trans Am sales went up 70 percent after Smokey and the Bandit, and I was promised a free car every year for life by the Pontiac president.

There are no awards in Hollywood for being an idiot.

I'm paying the third highest alimony and child support in the world. And the only two ahead of me are sheiks.

If you hang onto something long enough, it will come back in style.. Like ME.

I regret that I do not have the dignity of Ricardo Montalban, the class of Dean Martin, or the humor of Bill Cosby. I do have the heart of a lion.

I had known Hal [Needham] for a while by the time he moved in, so I was sure we'd get along well, and we did. He'd go off and do his gigs and I would do mine, and when we were lucky we got to work on the same ones.

Jay Leno is wonderful and a good friend, but it will always be the Carson show to a lot of people.