When it comes to Chinese food I have always operated under the policy that the less known about the preparation the better. A wise diner who is invited to visit the kitchen replies by saying, as politely as possible, that he has a pressing engagement elsewhere.

The Banh Mi sandwich is really the only good argument for colonialism.

The margin of error in astrology is plus or minus one hundred percent.

I don't care where I sit, as long as I get fed.

I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally.

Marriage is not merely sharing the fettucini, but sharing the burden of finding the fettucini restaurant in the first place.

"Law professors were never like economics professors," a Harvard Law professor told me. "If you disagreed with someone, you didn't call him a fool."