Sometimes, if I had until the next day to turn the story in, I'd head home, finding that the knot in the narrative came loose with the rhythmic clacking of the subway train.

Before I was born [my father] wanted me to go specifically to Yale, which he thought would help. It was easy for him to think I could be president: he didn't have to worry about being president himself, being ineligible because he wasn't born in the United States.

We all know funny people who can't get it down on the page - even funny writers who can't get it down on the page.

As far as I'm concerned, 'whom' is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler.

Once, in Lisbon, I tried my best to work the phone book in a way that would assuage a longing [Alice and I] had for certain Chinese dishes . . . .

I've always thought that parallel parking was my main talent.

The margin of error in astrology is plus or minus one hundred percent.