I'm sure there are people who can toggle quickly from all-in caregiving to structured socializing, but I can't think of any offhand.

One helpful thing to keep in mind as a retort-stopper is that you won't "win," you won't change anyone's mind, you won't change any votes, you won't make the atmosphere in the room any better, YOU won't feel any better.

Sometimes the pain outweighs the good things.

There's nothing wrong with being happy somewhere, even if it's the little pond you grew up in, as long as you are in fact comfortable vs. bored.

Being negative is easy. There will always be a downside to everything good, a hurdle to everything desirable, a con to every pro. The real courage is in finding the good in what you have, the opportunities in every hurdle, the pros in every con.

I'm not a big fan of the white lie.

There is a difference between your parents' not reporting to you everything they do and keeping secrets from you.