I have a home in Orlando. That's kind of my default "getaway" city.

The street in the center of town was Butts road. I stole the sign and told the audience, this must be where the assholes live. I also had a Neighborhood Crime Watch - it takes about 20 seconds to break into a house but it took me an hour to unbolt this sign.

Before I got addicted to comedy, I was seriously thinking about playing tennis full time. I joined the tennis team and played with a lot of professionals.

Some people even think I wear a wig. Do they think I went into a salon one day and said, Can you please screw this up really bad?

People do give me a hard time about my hair because it's orange and it's big.

I always think everyone else is funnier than me. I look at other comedians and I say, 'I wish I was that good.' People think I'm funny, and I say, 'I'm not.'

I don't want to be known just as 'Carrot Top.' I don't always want to be this crazy, goofy guy.