Any time a little midget does something like this, you gotta give him a 10!.
I'm not a role model... Just because I dunk a basketball doesn't mean I should raise your kids.
I'd never buy my girl a watch... she's already got a clock over the stove.
These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it.
If ifs were gifts, every day would be Christmas.
I read that heavy drinking is bad for your health. I decided I better stop reading.