There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker.

Dear Sweetheart, Without you my days are endless. Days seem like weeks... Weeks feel like months... Months like years... Years like centuries... Centuries like... You get the idea.

You know what I think my best quality is? I think I'm nice to have around. I'd hate it if I weren't around!

What's this? That little red-haired girl dropped her pencil... Gee... It's got teeth marks all over it... She nibbles her pencil... She's human!

My grandfather has been very depressed lately. He just doesn't know what to do. He says it's late in the game, and he's afraid that life has him beaten." "Tell him to take out the goalie.

How can we lose when we're so sincere?

Happiness is a sad song.