Sometimes I lie awake at night, and wonder if my life would be different if I had to do it over... Then a voice comes to me out of the dark that says, "boy, there's an original thought!

Sometimes I think my soul is full of weeds!

All right, team... This is our first game of the season... If we all show the right spirit, I think we can win this one. Let's try to encourage each other... Let's hear a little chatter out there, okay?" "YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL, KID!

Sometimes I lie awake at night and think about that little red-haired girl... I don't ever want to forget her face, but if I don't forget her face, I'll go crazy... How can I remember the face I can't forget? Suddenly I'm writing country western music!

I gave up trying to understand people long ago. Now I let them try to understand me!

I have observed that whenever you try to hit somebody, there is a tendency for them to try to hit you back.

Humor is proof that everything is going to be all right with God nevertheless.