I kind of like that romantic image of being in a rocker with my family gathered around, all these generations in one room, listening intently to my stories.

Guys want to be respected and acknowledged. They want to feel what they contributed matters.

The only thing I'm addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent.

I’m not Thomas Jefferson. He was a pussy.

I am on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available. If you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.

Guys, IMDB right there, 62 movies, a ton of success, I mean, come on bro, I won best picture at 20. I wasn't even trying.

I knew if I got loaded I was going away for a while. People would say, Oh, you're just sober because you're on probation.