I'm like a bumper car. When I did an infomercial I was fodder for every TV comedy show. I couldn't get a job. People said I was a huge joke. I've been a joke so many times. I've been on my way out since I started, but I'm strong-willed. My mother is so much tougher than I am and my grandmother is so much tougher than my mother.

People are negative no matter what you do.

Searching for a boy in high school is as useless as searching for meaning in a Pauly Shore movie.

OMG! Is this true? [Marcus Bachmann] has a Christian clinic where he de-programs gay boys & girls! I'm gonna strangle him with my Boa!

I remember a great America where we made everything. There was a time when the only thing you got from Japan was a really bad cheap transistor radio that some aunt gave you for Christmas.

If a man's a good kisser, he's a great f-.

I've never compromised who I am not ever. If I've gotten anywhere in my life it's been on my own merits.