I probably get one or two days off every five or six weeks.

You walk into a strip club with a wad of cash; they all flock around you. Strippers are just pigeons with tits. They go where the bread is.

Rats are just Ziploc bags full of disease.

Twitter is really a hyper-distilled version of how the internet should work - short bursts of relatively useful information.

There's something about shooting webs out of my wrists and climbing up things that just makes me happy.

There are certain parts of a classic nerd's brain that can destroy that person - obsessing about things to the detriment of everything else in your life. But those are the same tools that you can use to turn everything around.

When I was in grade school I was into chess club, Latin club, D&D, computer camp - everything that made vaginas go away.