I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

If you live below your means, you can turn down stuff all the time.

Remember when we was young, everybody used to have these arguments about who's better, Michael Jackson or Prince? Prince won!

I never watched the Oscars. Come on, it's a fashion show . . . What straight black man sits there and watches the Oscars? Show me one. And they don't recognize comedy, and you don't see a lot of black people nominated, so why should I watch it?

Are we so desperate for entertainment that we will fall for a Trickless magician?? Saw a woman in half. Pull a rabbit out of a hat. Do something! What tricks does this guy have? "I'm in a box...and I ain't gonna eat.". "I'm in a box... and I ain't gonna eat!!" That ain't no trick! That's called living in the projects!

The U.S government hates rap music

Unlike flying or astral projection, walking through walls is an earthbound pursuit.