Standup comedians are attracted to one another because of their faults. So we're all kind of messed up in the same way, and once I was around a group of people that saw the world in a different way, it's like this is where I need to be.

I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

If you live below your means, you can turn down stuff all the time.

George Bush hates midgets.

The thing about having an audience right there laughing is that critics can write what they want, but the proof is right there in front of you.

My movies are okay, but they're not my specials.

I've told Michael Jackson jokes. If you got really technical, you could say those are jokes about child molestation. You could, if you got technical. A lot of this is just selective outrage because honestly, the audience are the ones that tell us that something shouldn't be spoken. The audience lets us know. And I've never, in my almost 30 years of being a comedian, seen a comedian continue to tell a joke that the audience doesn't respond to. I've never seen it.