Life is an irritation.

...One time you take a hundred thousand dollars and let a vampire go, the whole world turns on you like you're some kind of bad guy.

Do we still have to floss?" Tommy asked. "I mean, what's the point of being immortal if we have to floss?

The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear.

I think I'm what they call a never-was.

. . . And so Charlie Asher . . . led an army of fourteen-inch-tall bundles of animal bits, armed with everything from knitting needles to a spork, into the storm sewers of San Fransciso.

You think you know how this story is going to end, but you don't.