Take the time to smell the roses. Sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee and die.

When you're born, you're pure. Unspoiled and trusting. I believed everything and everyone. Then, I met my parents!

If you want something bad enough, you've got to make a bold move. George Washington, took on the British Empire. Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. Ken Titus taped a hotel key to his underwear to score with an airport security guard.

So what if your custom car shop tanks and you've gotta take a crappy job at an auto parts store, dealing with ignorant, pushy people. I'm okay with that, 'cause I'm an ignorant, pushy people person.

Fighting Dad's not a fight. Fighting dad is, "Hi, you've just instigated your own mugging! Come on down!"

Pope John Paul didn't die - he pre-boarded.

Clint Eastwood doesn't moisturize! But Clint Eastwood needs to moisturize!