I realized that my book readings were boring me. I was going to go up there and read a passage and sleepwalk through the whole event and I needed to make it more interesting. I wanted to be running and jumping and do something so that the event would be so exciting. I had to trick myself into having fun every time.

A male chauvinist pig isn't born, he's made, and more and more of them are being made by women.

There are worse things you can do to the people you love than kill them. The regular way is just to watch the world do it. Just read the newspaper.

Stanislavski was right, you can find fresh pain every time you discover what you pretty much already know.

The same as real life, there is no happily ever after.

It's funny how you never think about the women you've had. It's always the ones who get away that you can't forget.

Trust me, the being-dead part is much easier than the dying part. If you can watch much television, then being dead will be a cinch. Actually, watching television and surfing the Internet are really excellent practice for being dead.