I've always had a sneaking fondness for Martin Van Buren. He wrote his autobiography, you know, and never once mentioned his wife. Now that's what I call a mans man.

For an animal person, an animal-less home is no home at all.

What this world needs is a new kind of army - the army of the kind.

I detest professional anythings but particularly professional writers. Most of them today are just garbage collectors.

The customer is always right! John Wanamaker must be turning in his grave. If you're a customer today, you're an intruder.

...one of the ways in which cats show happiness is by sleeping.

I've always had a sneaking fondness for Martin Van Buren. He wrote his autobiography, you know, and never once mentioned his wife. Now that's what I call a mans man.