I don’t smoke, I don’t drink, I don’t use drugs. That may be boring for some people, but that’s just me. That’s how I live my life. That stuff never appealed to me and I never understood getting so messed up that you can’t even walk home or remember the previous night. I choose to live my life without it.

I drink this [whiskey glass] and I'm just another JBL? you don't get it, I'm not like you. I'm not JBL, I'm CM Punk! Sometimes it's what you don't do that makes you who you are.

Don't look at me like that, Michael Cole.

No matter how much people want to pretend that they're embarrassed by it, that they don't watch it, everybody knows about it. It's truly, I believe, one of the only art forms that America has actually given to the world, besides jazz and comic books.

I'm straight edge, and that means I'm better than you.

He spilled my diet soda!

Fix him so I can break him again!